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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286061">To Say Nothing of the Cat</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/chofi/pseuds/chofi'>chofi</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Final Fantasy XV</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - No Prophecy (Final Fantasy XV), Eos Compendium, Inspired By Tumblr, Multi, no prophecy no war no problem, rated t for cursing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 10:33:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,501</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286061</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/chofi/pseuds/chofi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Here Luna smiled, and Prompto always, always melted a little. “My challenge is this: my cat shall be given the freedom of the city. On my cat is a collar, and on that collar is a key. I shall only marry the one who can use that key to open the door to my residence in Insomnia.”</p><p>Or, "In which a cat crosses Prompto's path, and only wants to hang out and watch TV." For the Eos Compendium zine.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Prompto Argentum/Lunafreya Nox Fleuret/Noctis Lucis Caelum</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>133</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Eos Compendium</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>To Say Nothing of the Cat</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The news spread like wildfire across all of Lucis: the Oracle, Lady Lunafreya, would temporarily move her residence to Insomnia. Her family and the royal family of Lucis visited each other from time to time, of course, but Lady Lunafreya made it sound like she was planning to stay for quite a while. That was already enough news for some. Even greater, even more unexpected, was news of her Challenge. People always made it sound like it deserved that capital C whenever talking about it.</p><p>The Challenge was presented in a video that had been seen, shared, and memorized by all potential contestants, Prompto included. He had it bookmarked <em> and </em> saved on his phone and his laptop. You could tell immediately it wasn’t going to be a typical royal address: It began with Lady Lunafreya sitting primly on a high-backed chair, <em> not </em> a throne. She was in clothes that you’d expect someone to wear on a nice date instead of her usual white on white everything. On her lap was a black cat with the bluest eyes Prompto had even seen. Her trident, her standard, and the Royal Seal of Tenebrae were nowhere to be seen. </p><p>The cat nestled into her lap, and she began: “The time has come for me to think carefully about the future of my family and of Tenebrae. However, I feel that the arrangements of a traditional courtship would not prove best for my happiness. My intended should know how to act in a variety of situations, meet difficult challenges, and solve unexpected problems.” Here she smiled, and Prompto always, <em> always </em> melted a little. “My challenge is this: my cat shall be given the freedom of the city. On my cat is a collar, and on that collar is a key. I shall only marry the one who can use that key to open the door to my residence in Insomnia.”</p><p>People went <em> nuts </em>. Cat food and catnip were in short supply. There were debates on what fish Lady Lunafreya’s cat might like best. People stalked around parks with cat carriers. Shelters and animal control were swamped with calls. People made bets on who’d be the one to catch the cat, how they’d do it, and how fast they’d do it. </p><p>Turns out, not fast at all.</p><p>There was an avalanche of photos and videos of the cat in different parts of Insomnia. Someone’d chase after it (accompanied by shaky-cam video), and then it’d always, <em> always </em> disappear. Prompto could identify a lot of the locales where the cat had been spotted since his jobs took him all around the city. He hadn’t seen the cat once in person (in feline?), though; he felt cursed.</p><p>As the weeks went by, the number of people looking for Lady Lunafreya’s cat plummeted, as did the numbers of photos and videos. Prompto had already shrugged his shoulders at his cursed-ness and went about his life.</p><p>And then a black cat crossed his path.</p><hr/><p>There was a good breeze going, so Prompto had the balcony doors open to air out his apartment. Insomnian summers weren’t a joke, but using his AC too much would brown out half the building. He was so busy trying to get to platinum that he didn’t realize he had an audience. </p><p>A soft meow came from the balcony. Prompto jabbed the home button, put down his controller, and turned to the sound.</p><p>A black cat came through the balcony door, padded across the floor past where Prompto was sitting, and settled down where it had a good view of the television. A black cat with bright blue eyes, wearing a dark blue collar. On that collar was a silver key.</p><p>Lady Lunafreya's cat turned to face Prompto and meowed again.</p><p>Prompto kept eye contact with the cat--you were supposed to do that with cats, right?--and inched towards it. He held out his hand, and slowly reached towards the cat. His hand passed through a shower of blue sparks, and the cat was standing about half a meter back from where it had been before. Magic. Prompto had never seen magic this close before. It made sense that any cat that belonged to the Oracle would probably pick something up. </p><p>Prompto moved back to his original seated position, hands to himself. "Um, hi."</p><p>The cat blinked at him.</p><p>"Are you gonna stay here?"</p><p>The cat yawned.</p><p>“Well, if you’re not gonna leave, then just don’t make a mess, okay?”</p><p>The cat looked at him and blinked.</p><p>“Hope that was a ‘yes’,” Prompto said.</p><p>The cat got up, stretched, then jumped onto his bed. It circled around, flopped down, and went to sleep.</p><p>“Guess it <em> was </em> a yes.”</p><p>Prompto turned the console off. He didn’t know how much sleep cats needed, and it would suck if the noise kept it awake. He took out his phone and browsed around, looking up from time to time to check on the cat. It stayed asleep.</p><p>The cat was still sleeping when Prompto had to start getting ready for bed. He hesitated, but he left the balcony door open enough so that the cat could get out if it wanted. By the time he got back from the bathroom, the cat was gone.</p><p>The cat came back the next night, and the next.</p><p>On that third night, Prompto entered his room seeing the cat already seated on his bed, calmly waiting for him to continue his millionth replay of Last Legend IX. "If you're gonna hang out here so much, I need something to call you," Prompto announced.</p><p>The cat twitched an ear.</p><p>"What do you think of ‘Inky’?”  </p><p>The cat narrowed its eyes.</p><p>"Shadow? Shadow sounds kinda badass."</p><p>The cat flopped down on the bed.</p><p>Prompto huffed. So he wasn't good with making things up; shoot him or something. “Maybe Midnight?"</p><p>The cat perked up, looked at him, and slowly blinked. Some quick Moogling the day before had told Prompto that cats blinking meant they were okay with whoever was around them.</p><p>"Midnight it is, then!" Prompto grabbed some of his leftovers from the fridge and sat down at his table. It was a comfortable distance away from Midnight. The cat continued to wait.</p><hr/><p>Prompto was getting used to keeping his balcony door open when he was home. Midnight was...actually pretty cool to be around. He just kind of stayed somewhere and watched TV with Prompto. Or wandered around the apartment while he played video games. Or slept on his bed. As long as Prompto remembered that the cat needed his personal (feline?) space, everything was golden. </p><p>One night after work, Midnight was batting at something on the floor when Prompto found him. The something turned out to be some sort of notebook, small and with a blue and gold hard cover. Midnight darted out of the way as Prompto reached for the notebook. There were some bitemarks and scratches where Midnight had been grabbing onto the book. Praying the cat hadn't stolen it from some fancy stationery shop, Prompto opened the book to its first page. And nearly dropped the book. </p><p>
  <em> Please use this book to write whatever you wish to me. I’ll do my best to respond as soon as I can. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> --Lunafreya Nox Fleuret </em>
</p><p>Still holding on to the notebook, Prompto fished around his stuff for a pen. He found a blue one buried together with his socks. He sat down at his table with his pen and the notebook. Midnight bound up onto the table to watch him. Feeling <em> really </em> self-conscious about his handwriting, Prompto worked out his reply: </p><p>
  <em> Dear Lady Lunafreya: </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I don’t really know what to write. My name is Prompto Argentum and Midnight (I named your cat “Midnight” because I don’t know his real name. Is that okay?) likes to hang out with me for part of the night. We watch TV and he likes watching me play video games. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Is there anything I need to know about Midnight? About food or medicine or anything? I haven’t had any pets before and I don’t want to do anything to mess up.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> --Prompto </em>
</p><p>Prompto closed the book and kept it on the table. The rest of the night played out like the others: they watched some TV, Midnight watched him eat, and sometime when Prompto was in the bathroom to get ready for bed, Midnight left. So had the blue notebook.</p><hr/><p>Midnight was back again the next night, of course, but that night he also made sure to call attention to the notebook also reappearing. Prompto flipped the book open and found a response to what he’d written:</p><p>
  <em> Dear Prompto: </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Midnight isn’t my cat’s name, but it’s a fine one. Please continue to use it. And please feel free to refer to me as Luna. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I don’t have much of an interest in video games, and I don’t have much time for watching television. Perhaps that’s why he’s so keen on them. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Midnight” is usually quite temperamental with strangers, but he seems to trust you. He doesn’t have any special dietary needs. If necessary, he may have small amounts of cooked fish. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> --Luna </em>
</p><p>Prompto closed the notebook and frowned at Midnight. The cat was on the table and sniffing his tuna melt. Prompto reached towards the cat, going slowly. The cat arched his back and looked annoyed. Should cats even be able to do that?</p><p>Prompto pulled his hand back. “Seriously? Fine. Eat the dinner I slaved over.”</p><p>The cat circled the plate, batted away the top slice of toast on one of the sandwich halves, and started eating the tuna part of his tuna melt. With a cold knot in his stomach, Prompto started looking through Moogle.</p><p>
  <em> Dear Luna: </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I know you said that cooked fish was okay, but what about tuna melts? Do they have tuna melts in Tenebrae? It’s tuna salad and cheese on toast. Midnight didn’t eat the toast, though. Only the tuna salad part. I tried searching through Moogle but I only found stuff about cats eating tuna. Midnight looks okay so far but if he needs to go to the vet I’ll pay for it, don’t worry. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> --Prompto </em>
</p><p>Midnight seemed to have finished eating, because he jumped off the table and went straight to Prompto’s bed. Prompto pushed away the untouched half of the tuna melt and joined Midnight on the bed. He kept a tab of his phone’s browser open to animal hospitals, just in case.</p><p>Prompto fought with himself over keeping up his regular routine. He needed a shower because he had work in the morning. Midnight was being Midnight (that is, staying flopped on Prompto’s bed and sleeping) and not acting sick at all. Hoping he wasn’t making a decision he’d regret, Prompto grabbed a clean towel and headed for the bathroom.</p><p>When Prompto returned from the bathroom, Midnight was gone, along with the notebook.</p><hr/><p>A photo of a yellow handheld game system was glued to the top of the latest page of the notebook. The system in the photo was turned on, displaying the title screen of Last Legend IX. </p><p>
  <em> Dear Prompto:  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I am slowly progressing through Last Legend IX. I continue to sympathize with Garnet’s plight. I thank you again for the recommendation.  </em>
</p><p>Prompto tried not to pop off. (He’d probably squish Midnight by mistake.) Still, though, he absolutely called Luna liking Garnet. </p><p>Midnight jumped onto the table and batted at Prompto’s orange soda. Prompto moved his bottle out of the cat’s reach. “Sorry, but I <em> know </em> that cats can’t have soda.”</p><p>Midnight made his “This sucks” noise and flopped down on the table. Prompto rolled his eyes and got out Midnight’s water dish. (Yes, he’d caved and gotten cat stuff just for a cat that only visited him at night.) He poured out filtered water from the pitcher that stayed in the fridge and set it in front of Midnight. “Here, <em> this </em> you <em> can </em> drink.”</p><p>Midnight made his “Okay, fine” growl and started drinking. Prompto took his bottle of soda and the notebook with him over to the other end of the room.</p><p><em> Dear Luna </em>: </p><p><em> I </em> <em> knew </em> <em> you’d like Garnet! Not just for the princess thing, though. I’m really partial to Vivi, myself. </em></p><p>
  <em> How far are you? Garnet’s story gets better (Worse, too. It gets kind of sad.) as you continue playing. Just let me know if you want any tips or anything... </em>
</p><hr/><p>Midnight kept staring at the balcony. Prompto got up and examined it with him. “Want me to close the door?”</p><p>Midnight yowled and went through the balcony door. He turned and looked expectantly at Prompto. He yowled again.</p><p>Prompto joined him on the balcony. You could see the Citadel from this side of the building, and it was kind of nice.</p><p>Midnight jumped up to the balcony railing and looked out at the view. He turned back to look at Prompto. Then the cat stretched and jumped down to the street.</p><p>“<em> Seriously </em>,” Prompto cried. He leapt inside, slammed the balcony door closed, grabbed his shoes and his keys, and ran down the stairs to grab his not-cat before he got run over by a truck or something. </p><p>Prompto stopped a few meters away from Midnight, who was patiently waiting in the middle of the street. “<em> Please </em> get out of the street,” Prompto said. “Luna would kill me if something happened to you.” Would it count as treason if the Oracle’s cat got hurt while Prompto was taking care of him? What was the punishment for treason?</p><p>Midnight walked to the other side of the street and sat down. He yowled. Prompto walked across the street. Again, Midnight stepped away just as he was nearly in Prompto’s reach. Prompto stepped forward, and Midnight continued to back away. Midnight expected Prompto to follow him. </p><p>The cat made sure to keep a few lengths ahead of Prompto, but paused and turned around every so often to check. Prompto arrived in a tree-lined neighborhood (he’s pretty sure it’s near his high school) where everything looked clean and expensive. Everything was also behind a wall or a metal fence.</p><p>The cat leapt up a white stone wall, walked around its top, and bound up again to a dark metal balcony with an open glass door. Prompto could make out, just barely, Midnight leaping into Lady Lunafreya's arms. </p><p>Prompto took a look around the clean, white everything around him, then down at his ratty clothes and ancient running shoes. He turned around and headed for home.</p><p>The notebook was waiting for him on the table. (Had it even been there when Midnight had come over tonight? Prompto couldn’t remember.) Prompto flipped it open past his crappy Vivi fanart to Luna’s latest response.</p><p>
  <em> Dear Prompto: </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Thank you for your kind offer, but I’d like to go into the game blind. (That’s the correct term, isn’t it?)   </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Would you join me for afternoon tea tomorrow? I’d like to meet you in person and put a face to your words. I hope “Midnight” can guide you to my residence, as I’m confident he knows the way by now. Please don’t worry over matters of protocol... </em>
</p><p>Prompto put down the notebook and ransacked his closet for something that said “I know I’m Pleby McPleberson, but I was officially invited here.”</p><hr/><p>Notebook in hand and dressed in something that was way too close to his high school uniform for comfort, Prompto went back to the tree-lined, wrought iron filled neighborhood that Midnight had led him to. Everything looked… strange in the daylight. Extra awkward points for the place actually being close to his old high school. He retraced his steps to the tall, white wall that Midnight had jumped a few nights ago.</p><p>Prompto took a few deep breaths. His palms were sweaty. He opened the gateway--</p><p>--and nearly crashed into the Prince.</p><p>Prompto knew who Prince Noctis was, of course. They’d gone to high school together. They’d been in the same homeroom, in fact, but Prompto had been too chickenshit to do anything besides say hello every so often. <em> You </em> try to do more than say hello to the prince of your whole entire country, who had eyes that were this disturbingly attractive shade of blue!</p><p>There was something gleaming on the ground. Prompto and Prince Noctis both ducked down for it at the same time, and knocked their foreheads together. </p><p>Prompto shot back up, letting Prince Noctis pick up what was on the ground. Prompto knew what it was. How could he not, when he’d seen it on Midnight’s neck every night for weeks now? Prince Noctis pocketed the key to Lady Lunafreya’s door like it was nothing, because for a prince to marry a princess was just the natural way of things.</p><p>Prince Noctis was accompanied by two very scary looking guys. The taller one was your traditional imposing wall of muscle that could probably snap Prompto in half and <em> not </em> in the fun way. The (slightly) shorter, glasses-wearing one probably knew how to kill people and make it look like an accident.</p><p>Scary muscles guy frowned. “Is this guy giving you trouble, Your Highness?”</p><p>The Prince frowned at scary muscles guy. “No, there isn’t any problem at all.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Prompto said, backing off. “Don’t worry, I… made a mistake.” Very big. Huge. He didn’t stop running until he reached his apartment.</p><hr/><p>Midnight showed up that night, like he always did. Dinner was quick; Prompto didn't feel like talking. He wasn't in the mood to achievement hunt, either. He stretched out on his bed. Social media was probably blowing up with the news of Prince Noctis marrying Lady Lunafreya, so checking his phone was out.</p><p>Midnight jumped into the bed, then onto him. The cat flopped down on his chest. </p><p>"Oh, so <em> now </em> you want to get cuddly," Prompto said. “I guess now that the Prince is gonna marry Lady Lunafreya, you don’t have to be so paranoid.”</p><p>Midnight sat up to look at him, blinked, and flopped down on Prompto’s chest again.</p><p>“I hope you don’t start hissing or scratching at him.” Prompto reached towards the cat, going slowly. Midnight ducked under his hand and guided himself across Prompto’s hand. Prompto took the hint and started stroking his head and back. Midnight started purring. “And make sure he knows that you can’t drink orange soda.”</p><p>Prompto didn’t really remember when he fell asleep. </p><hr/><p>He woke up alone. On his nightstand was the notebook, left open to the latest page, where Prompto had been rambling about cameras.</p><p>The message waiting for him wasn’t in Lady Lunafreya’s handwriting:</p><p>
  <em> Prompto: </em>
</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> Please</em></span>
  <em>go back to Luna’s house this afternoon for tea. She really wanted to see you face to face yesterday. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> -Noct </em>
</p><p>
  <em> P.S. I’m sorry that Gladio and Ignis scared you. They’re actually kind of cool, once you get to know them. </em>
</p><p>Taped below the message (from <em> Prince Noctis </em>, what the actual fuck) was a silver key.</p><p>Prompto flopped back down on his bed. He pinched his left hand, then his right. He wondered what he was going to wear.</p><hr/><p>Prince Noctis helped Prompto to his seat at a table set for three. Which was… pretty nice? Then he did the same with Lady Lunafreya. They were surrounded by plates of fancy little sandwiches and cookies. </p><p>Prompto took a deep breath. “So, why me?”</p><p>Prince Noctis looked bashful, and it was disturbingly adorable. “You were playing Last Legend IX.”</p><p>“Ah, I see you’re a man of cul--” Prompto stopped short, and narrowed his eyes at Noctis. “How did you know that?” Prince or not, there couldn’t be government cameras set up to watch what everybody was doing all the time, let alone see when some rando was playing video games.</p><p>“I was wandering around and I thought I heard the battle music for nine. The balcony wasn’t that far up, so I went to see who was playing. The door was open, and you were sitting there having fun, andyou’reprettycute so--”</p><p>“You were Midnight,” Prompto said. “You can turn into a cat, and--did you just say I was cute?” Magical princes he could understand. Magical princes who <em> think he’s cute </em> are something else entirely. </p><p>“It <em> is </em> a reasonable assessment, Prompto,” said Lady Lunafreya. Wait, wait, did they <em> both </em> think he was cute? “And from what Noctis has told me, and from what you’ve shared of yourself during our correspondence, I feel that you’d make a suitable consort for us, if you’d have us.”</p><p>Prompto opened his mouth, then closed it. He opened it again, and closed it again. He tried one more time. “Could we go out on some dates first?”</p><p>Lady Lunafreya leaned over and kissed Prompto’s cheek. “I don’t mean to force you into anything before you’re ready.” Prompto felt his face grow warm.</p><p>Prince Noctis kissed Prompto’s other cheek. “That goes for me, too.” Prompto was pretty sure he would burst into flames any second now. </p><p>The least Prompto could do was make sure not to spontaneously combust before kissing them back.  </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>My fic for Eos Compendium!</p><p>This was inspired by <a href="https://haaskarotta.tumblr.com/post/184616003264/story-idea-the-most-wanted-woman-in-town-has">this Tumblr post</a> about courtship through a cat. I changed it up because I am PromLuNoct trash and we must all live with that.</p><p>Shoutouts to @RaspEchinacea on Twitter for the idea of not!FFIX, and to the FFXV Book Club Discord in general for existing.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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